Liam (guitar) was "born" 3 years ago when scientists found an empty beer bottle that had been used by Hillel Slovak, Dave Navarro and John Fruisciante, and set about extracting the DNA. In 6 months he was fully grown and learnt 9 chords before saying his first word - "valve". At only just over 3, Liam is still not house trained and relies on a liquid diet.

 

Ollie (Drums) has a background that is less well documented. It is known his mother was a pioneer in ladies' professional bowling and is suspected his father is Shaku Zulu (the illegimate son of Senzangakona, chief of all the Zulus). It is thought this is where he gets his penchant for hitting things, rhythm and being a bastard.

 

Freddie (Bass) is known for his chequered past and use of low frequencies to satisfy his many past sexual partners. It was Freddie's life that inspired the song “Sir Psycho Sexy”.

 

Tommy (Vocals) is an enigma - standing tall where many have fallen before him and consistently displaying the skills that pay any invoices issued within agreed credit terms.